Reflecting on Life and Counting my Blessings
Just finished a call with my aunt. She told me how she was at home when she heard a loud "BOM!" sound the other day and didn't dare look out of the window. The last time she did, she saw an old man sprawled on the ground in a pool of blood - it was an image that haunted her. She knew when she heard that sound again that someone had jumped.
Later on, when the police and undertakers came, she looked and saw that it was a neighbour that she knew. She said she could see that he was in his favourite shirt that she frequently saw him in. His eyes were closed and he looked peaceful - there was hardly any blood. As they carried him away, his shirt flapped up and she saw a dressing on his stomach.
I had seen his obituary today as well. I always check the obituary to make sure none of my teachers have left this plane of existence yet. I saw a very adorable little girl's obituary and 2 young men's obituary. I stopped to look at both - one was a father of 3 and only 36, the other was 39 and looked like a spirited person in his photo. It turned out that the neighbour my aunt was talking about was him. Out of reverence, I shall not mention names.
She wondered about the courage it takes to jump, I wondered about how it would have been wonderful had he taken that courage and used it to live. We both felt very sad that he had chosen to give up so young. I don't know him but I felt sad.
From his obituary, it is clear he is a Christian.
I used to think, when I was a Catholic, that once you commit suicide you got to Hell. But a pastor made it clear that no where in the bible does it say that. I'm not God so I shall neither judge nor play God... He is a GOOD GOD and a forgiving and loving Father, I trust that this man is the righteousness of God in Christ and that he is with God now. God's grace is more than sufficient for us. Amen.
Having been suicidal before, I still don't think it is the best answer for one's problems. Had I given up those years ago, I might not enjoy the happiness I do today.
God takes what is meant to harm us, into even larger blessings for us.
I like what Pastor Mark said during Sermon on Sunday. He was quoting Pastor Prince, our senior Pastor... Jesus is our Saviour and the only requirement for us to have Him as our Saviour is to be a failure, a sinner.
How easily we qualify! Each one of us has sinned, each one of us has failed from time to time. Had God raised the bar and required perfection from us, Heaven might be a pretty empty place =) But His requirement is as amazing as His grace and love - it requires nothing from us but to receive the gift.
Gift.
Now that reminds me of a quote I liked from Kungfun Panda -
"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift - that is why it is called the present."
Being alive today is a gift in itself! Something to rejoice about and to praise Him for... but how many of us wake up to thank God for another wonderful new day filled with grace, mercy and manna aka daily bread for the taking?
So many of us wake up taking the day for granted, the people in it for granted then ending the day disappointed or angry - feelings that run over to the next day and the next - till all that is left of us is a bitter, dried up core.
Thinking of the young man who took his life, the other young man who has left 3 kids behind with a wife who must be quite young too and the little girl who passed on at a tender age, I thank God for today.
After reading the LIFE page today and seeing how Liu Ling Ling's greatest desire is to be a mother - to go through the process of pregnancy, childbirth and bringing up her kid - I also count my blessing in Kae. I am undeserving of such a bright, cheery, cheeky and handsome little boy who is also very passionate for Christ... but I have been blessed. Interestingly, I used to say that Kae is my "anti-suicide" gift from Daddy. Then, Daddy further blessed my life with greater meaning in my husband, Ian.
I honestly have no excuse not to enjoy my life every step of the way. HE has been so good to me.
I thank God for the food that nourished my family and I this day... for the opportunities that presented themselves and the myriad blessings seen and unseen, known and unknown that has covered us this very day.
Thank you God. Thank you Jesus. You have commanded Your blessings on me and nothing and no one can take those blessings away. =) Hallelujah!
Later on, when the police and undertakers came, she looked and saw that it was a neighbour that she knew. She said she could see that he was in his favourite shirt that she frequently saw him in. His eyes were closed and he looked peaceful - there was hardly any blood. As they carried him away, his shirt flapped up and she saw a dressing on his stomach.
I had seen his obituary today as well. I always check the obituary to make sure none of my teachers have left this plane of existence yet. I saw a very adorable little girl's obituary and 2 young men's obituary. I stopped to look at both - one was a father of 3 and only 36, the other was 39 and looked like a spirited person in his photo. It turned out that the neighbour my aunt was talking about was him. Out of reverence, I shall not mention names.
She wondered about the courage it takes to jump, I wondered about how it would have been wonderful had he taken that courage and used it to live. We both felt very sad that he had chosen to give up so young. I don't know him but I felt sad.
From his obituary, it is clear he is a Christian.
I used to think, when I was a Catholic, that once you commit suicide you got to Hell. But a pastor made it clear that no where in the bible does it say that. I'm not God so I shall neither judge nor play God... He is a GOOD GOD and a forgiving and loving Father, I trust that this man is the righteousness of God in Christ and that he is with God now. God's grace is more than sufficient for us. Amen.
Having been suicidal before, I still don't think it is the best answer for one's problems. Had I given up those years ago, I might not enjoy the happiness I do today.
God takes what is meant to harm us, into even larger blessings for us.
I like what Pastor Mark said during Sermon on Sunday. He was quoting Pastor Prince, our senior Pastor... Jesus is our Saviour and the only requirement for us to have Him as our Saviour is to be a failure, a sinner.
How easily we qualify! Each one of us has sinned, each one of us has failed from time to time. Had God raised the bar and required perfection from us, Heaven might be a pretty empty place =) But His requirement is as amazing as His grace and love - it requires nothing from us but to receive the gift.
Gift.
Now that reminds me of a quote I liked from Kungfun Panda -
"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift - that is why it is called the present."
Being alive today is a gift in itself! Something to rejoice about and to praise Him for... but how many of us wake up to thank God for another wonderful new day filled with grace, mercy and manna aka daily bread for the taking?
So many of us wake up taking the day for granted, the people in it for granted then ending the day disappointed or angry - feelings that run over to the next day and the next - till all that is left of us is a bitter, dried up core.
Thinking of the young man who took his life, the other young man who has left 3 kids behind with a wife who must be quite young too and the little girl who passed on at a tender age, I thank God for today.
After reading the LIFE page today and seeing how Liu Ling Ling's greatest desire is to be a mother - to go through the process of pregnancy, childbirth and bringing up her kid - I also count my blessing in Kae. I am undeserving of such a bright, cheery, cheeky and handsome little boy who is also very passionate for Christ... but I have been blessed. Interestingly, I used to say that Kae is my "anti-suicide" gift from Daddy. Then, Daddy further blessed my life with greater meaning in my husband, Ian.
I honestly have no excuse not to enjoy my life every step of the way. HE has been so good to me.
I thank God for the food that nourished my family and I this day... for the opportunities that presented themselves and the myriad blessings seen and unseen, known and unknown that has covered us this very day.
Thank you God. Thank you Jesus. You have commanded Your blessings on me and nothing and no one can take those blessings away. =) Hallelujah!
It is sad that some people decide to take it upon themselves to take care of things, in this instance, ending his own life. But that is the reality of not knowing God, and not know how good He is.
ReplyDeleteIt is sad that people just didn't know Jesus, that there was no time or space to let Him in and see that God is here and God is good for many wonderful and REAL reasons.