Hang on. Help is on the way.
Just to share-
When I was 15- ostracised, molested, depressed, misunderstood, dabbling in new age garbage- I sat on the edge of my window one night, just wanting to end my life.
It was 2 or 3 am in the morning, my door was lock and I was alone in my room crying my heart out because I was just so broken up inside.
I got ready to let go and all the thoughts in my head said - it's for the better. Your parents will eventually be happier since they fight mostly about you, your boyfriend will move on somehow, everything will return to normal after a while. And you won't have to suffer this crap anymore. Just let go. Lies upon lies upon lies by who else but the devil.
I was going to jump when I felt something pull me back from behind. There was no one in the room mind you. =p
I landed on the bed in shock as I realised what I had almost done. I shivered the whole night through.
I believe it was the angels that Psalm 91 speaks about that pulled me back. I prayed Psalm 91 and 23 a lot as a youth and could even memorize it. God is mighty to save and He did.
My struggle with depression was a long and ardous one, and finding out I was preggers out of wedlock seemed to be the straw to break the camel's back. BUT God takes what is meant to stumble us and turns it into a blessing.
Sure it was hard being a single mum and getting all sorts of crazy treatment and disdainful looks. =) But it got easier as I walked in Him day after day after day. It got even easier as I came to understand grace and to walk in grace. You learn to love others, to love yourself because you've been loved much by Christ who showed the extent of that love by opening His arms up on that Cross.
Today I look at my son and I praise God. Being loved and loving that little one has brought me closer to Jesus, to my parents and blessed my life with so much joy and hope and little lessons on faith.
GOD is good and if you are reading this and contemplating suicide, HANG ON! You can overcome it and you will, and when you do, you will be in a better place than you were before. HUGS!
(Pls note: I posted a version of this on Malcolm's blog's comment page and felt led to post it here too. So just being obedient to the LORD. Who knows? You might have been led to read this so you can help someone or be helped. Jesus loves you!)
When I was 15- ostracised, molested, depressed, misunderstood, dabbling in new age garbage- I sat on the edge of my window one night, just wanting to end my life.
It was 2 or 3 am in the morning, my door was lock and I was alone in my room crying my heart out because I was just so broken up inside.
I got ready to let go and all the thoughts in my head said - it's for the better. Your parents will eventually be happier since they fight mostly about you, your boyfriend will move on somehow, everything will return to normal after a while. And you won't have to suffer this crap anymore. Just let go. Lies upon lies upon lies by who else but the devil.
I was going to jump when I felt something pull me back from behind. There was no one in the room mind you. =p
I landed on the bed in shock as I realised what I had almost done. I shivered the whole night through.
I believe it was the angels that Psalm 91 speaks about that pulled me back. I prayed Psalm 91 and 23 a lot as a youth and could even memorize it. God is mighty to save and He did.
My struggle with depression was a long and ardous one, and finding out I was preggers out of wedlock seemed to be the straw to break the camel's back. BUT God takes what is meant to stumble us and turns it into a blessing.
Sure it was hard being a single mum and getting all sorts of crazy treatment and disdainful looks. =) But it got easier as I walked in Him day after day after day. It got even easier as I came to understand grace and to walk in grace. You learn to love others, to love yourself because you've been loved much by Christ who showed the extent of that love by opening His arms up on that Cross.
Today I look at my son and I praise God. Being loved and loving that little one has brought me closer to Jesus, to my parents and blessed my life with so much joy and hope and little lessons on faith.
GOD is good and if you are reading this and contemplating suicide, HANG ON! You can overcome it and you will, and when you do, you will be in a better place than you were before. HUGS!
(Pls note: I posted a version of this on Malcolm's blog's comment page and felt led to post it here too. So just being obedient to the LORD. Who knows? You might have been led to read this so you can help someone or be helped. Jesus loves you!)
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